Trauma-Informed Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples
Find greater intimacy and connection.
Emotionally Focused Therapy is one of the most effective and most researched couple therapies.
Couples I work with love EFT because it helps them experience greater security in their bond. They learn how to meet one another’s attachment needs, which is critical for creating and maintaining long-term relationships. When these needs are met, love heals.
EFT can help with…
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Communication Issues
Most couples come to therapy because of communication issues. Key emotional signals often get scrambled and couples miss each other when they are needed the most. In EFT, you have an experience of communicating with your partner in a way that builds connection.
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Lack of Trust
Many couples can identify specific events where trust was lost in the relationship. Others may have come into the relationship with deep trust issues to begin with. One of the first steps in EFT is creating emotional safety in the relationship. EFT develops trust by helping partners share their inner worlds.
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Emotional Regulation
Do emotions take you on a wild ride in your relationship that you didn’t sign up for? Do you live with anxiety or numbness? Are your reactions to each other out of proportion to the situation? EFT builds emotional balance within you individually and between you and your partner. The relationship then becomes a safe haven for comfort in the inevitable storms of life.
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Conflict Resolution
Do you get caught in painful conflicts that don’t resolve? Do you find yourself having the same conflict over and over again? People pleasing or giving up and pulling away? In EFT you build a secure bond, which helps you hold onto each other emotionally during conflict. After EFT, couples solve their conflicts on their own. They can be accessible, responsive, and engaged when the emotional heat is high.
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Lovelessness and Disconnection
Do you feel alone in your relationship? Have you or your partner pulled away? Or has it always been distant and you want a deeper bond? When bonds are insecure, partners may overcompensate by connection with the children, extended family, work, friends, electronic devices, affairs, or addictions. EFT can heal this disconnection with the one you love.
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Intimacy
Has intimacy fizzled out in your relationship? Is your relationship lacking the emotional safety necessary for you to feel like you can be intimate? Do you or your partner have a history of sexual trauma that is making it hard to sustain intimacy? EFT creates emotional connection that adds trust and excitement your sexual relationship.
Results that last.
In the research 90% of couples improved and over 70% were no longer in relational distress after EFT. The results were also sustained in the future. Couples improved even when facing challenges such as chronic illness of a partner or child or a history of childhood sexual abuse. It also decreased symptoms of depression, anxiety, and PTSD.
My Speciality in EFT
I have couples therapy experience working with infidelity, complex trauma, childhood abuse, childhood sexual abuse, sexual trauma, anxiety, depression, intrusive thoughts, chronic illness, parenthood, perinatal issues, DCFS, substance abuse, 12-step, and addiction recovery.
I have years of training in somatic and brain-based trauma treatments which can be helpful with couples where trauma responses or extreme reactivity is a part of their negative cycle. These treatments include Somatic Experiencing, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, Brainspotting, and EMDR.
For some clients, particularly when there is a trauma history, I draw from IFS-informed parts work while staying within the framework of the EFT model. This can be especially helpful for folks with IFS experience prior to couples therapy.
Based on original research, I created a framework for integrating art interventions with EFT that prioritizes fidelity to the EFT model - this may be helpful for those who resonate with visual ways of knowing.
I attend ongoing biweekly trainings in advanced EFT issues with researchers on the leading edge of couples therapy treatment.
Now accepting couples for EFT online in California.
